and I rant about my life here.
and a damn well expensive habit at that!
I’m afraid we’ve reached our turning point because you’re unable to accept things and actually be mature enough to get past it.
Just get over it because I’m over you, stop with all the bullshit mind control shit. I just want us to be back to normal.
A day after Valentine’s day and I found myself fantasising about love. For days now I’ve been thinking about love itself and I found myself absolutely removed from my usual realistic and cynical rants and just more “open”.
I was once a believer of true, long-lasting, heart wrenching love. The kind of love in which it feels as if your heart would explode. That love in which it feels as if you finally met someone who understands who you are completely. And although they see all your faults, they see past all your insecurities and flaws and love you despite of it and nonetheless.
But now, I don’t know what happened. I’ve lost her. That girl is gone and the world had turned her hard. Sometimes I just want her back, you know?
But it’s a little hard to do that when all these shit is planned so that I will have to see you.
I’m actually happy that you’re far away and I don’t hear from you so often. I guess that’s what we needed, actually what I needed - time away from you. Time that I needed so I wouldn’t care so much about anything that you do and time I needed to accept all “this”. I never needed to lean on you for anything or needed you at all for anything. I can hold my own, I always have - you just made me realise in my darkest hour that I could. I don’t owe you anything. Nothing at all.
Yes, it is.
2012 was the year where my life took through a lot of unexpected turns. From broken dreams to broken families to broken hearts to broken friendships throughout the whole year, it felt like it was just never ending. But in saying that and I know this is cliché, it had lead me to become a better person who sees things in a clearer light and a better understanding of life.